The most wonderful time of the year can be a whirlwind of time sensitive planning, traditions, and emotions for both children and parents. At the root of it all is an opportunity to celebrate your culture and be with the people you love. Let's plan for success for all the season may bring.
Preparation
Talk to your Occupational & Speech Therapists for tips specific to your child. Schedules
- Countdown timeline: Use a calendar or visual schedule to highlight important happenings and count down the days.
- This may include family coming to visit, decorations coming out / going away, traditions, holiday millstones, and school break beginning / ending.
- Advent calendars can be a great facilitator of counting down.
- Spread out the joy by making it a holiday week or even month by spreading out traditions.
- Include the whole family as part of the schedule/plan. If you have multiple children, take time to ensure their favorite parts of the holiday are included in your plans.
- Create a visual schedule for the day of the holiday.
- Work with a Speech Language Pathologist to expand their vocabulary and picture boards for the season.
- Keep the schedule / calendar easily accessible to the child.
- Use "First _____, then ______" language to reinforce your schedule.
- Schedule your child's usual activities throughout the season as well to maintain some normalcy.
- Examples: Going to the library, therapy appointments, swimming at the gym etc.
- Emphasize the activities that will be remaining the same vs only the changes. This can decrease anxiety around changes.
- Examples: Your friends/family might be dressed in bright festive clothes but they're still the same people you love.
- You can even create a game about what's staying the same to shift their focus on consistency.
- Explain the reason for routine changes and traditions. Some traditions or decorations can seem bizarre to someone who doesn't understand the purpose behind them.
- Examples: What are the religious reasons behind certain traditions, music, or events? Why is there a tree inside the house and why is it decorated? "Fir trees are green all year round and remind us that even in winter, things are alive and growing."
- Practice certain traditions ahead of time.
- Adapt traditions to make them your own and easier for the whole family to participate in.
Social Stories
- Getting Dressed for the Winter by And Next Comes L
- An Autism Advent Calendar for Schools by Network Autism
- What to Expect at Christmas by Positively Autism
- Going to Visit Santa by Positively Autism
- Visiting Family During Christmas by A Day in Our Shoes
- Hanukkah Blessings by Gateways
- We use Birthday Candles and Hanukkah Candles in Different Ways by Gateways
- Hanukkah Fire Safety by Gateways
Decorations
- Revisit pictures from previous holidays to show your home decorated.
- Gradually decorate the house/tree so that change is not sudden. Take decorations down in stages as well.
- Have your child help you decorate within their skill level (make ornaments, hang garland).
- Set rules for all decorations; what they can touch and what is off limits.
- Consider the placement of sentimental, valuable, or breakable ornaments/decorations. Keep them out of reach, out of shared areas of the house, under your direct supervision only, or don't put them out if damage would cause an emotional upset to anyone.
- Create a decoration free zone in the house. This could be your child's room or another room that's free from change and can function as a "safe-zone".
Presents
Shopping
- Call ahead and ask when stores are the least busy.
- Find stores that offer sensory-friendly shopping days. Toys 'R' Us and Target have been known to offer quiet shopping hours at different location across the country.
- Select gifts that are both fun and learning opportunities.
- Have your child help pick out their presents.
- Give them a budget to help teach math skills.
- If your child obsesses over a particular gift, be specific and direct about the number of times they can mention the gift each day.
- You can give them tokens or pictures of the gift you take each time they mention the gift.
- If you have no intention to get that gift for them, be direct with them and tell them that they will not receive that gift instead of saying maybe. Not being direct about your intentions can effect your child's trust in you.
Wrapping Gifts
Structure
Sensory Overload & Safety
- If your child has fine motor difficulties, set them up for success:
- Create easy to open wrapping by make the overlaps loose where the wrapping paper edges meet and pull tabs with tape and bow.
- Remove difficult packaging, such as zip ties, before wrapping. If getting to the toy is frustrating, the child may reject the gift.
- The inability to see the present can contribute to unpredictability and create anxiety.
- Cellophane see-through wrapping paper can give your child the fun of unwrapping a gift and relieve the anxiety of uncertainty for whats inside.
- Label each wrapped gift with a picture of what is inside. Similarly build these pictures into the social social of what they're gifted for the holiday.
- Put pictures of the gift recipient on the gift instead of names to easily direct your child to who it belongs to.
- Prepare the gift for immediate play!
- If a present needs to be built, put together, or batteries installed, do this before wrapping the present.
- Also consider if building the gift is part of the fun or a learning tool for them - careful not to stifle a learning opportunity by doing it all for them.
- Wrap up a preferred familiar toy to set up positive engagement from your child.
- Establish rules ahead of time. This is another opportunity to incorporate into the schedule / calendar you create and into social stories.
- Gifts aren't to be opened without the rest of the family there.
- Gifts are to be opened at a specific date and time.
- Explain what is socially appropriate for gift giving and receiving.
- Address that sometimes your child might receive a gift they don't like and we still thank the person it's from.
- Role play appropriate social interactions.
- Give your child one gift at a time to avoid overwhelm.
- Spread the gift giving over a few days to spread out the joy and reduce overwhelm.
- Use a visual symbol that its time or someone's turn to open their gift. Example: The person wearing the Santa hat gets to open their gift.
- Assign your child to "Play Santa" and distribute the presents to each family member. This allows them to have some control among the unpredictability.
Sensory Overload & Safety
- Teach them an appropriate way to leave a situation or access support when they become overwhelmed. These self management skills will serve them well into adulthood.
- Help them understand the signs they need a break before they start showing those signs. Example: When they want to yell, tummy hurts, hands tighten into fists, face feels red.
- Identify their signs of heightened state as well. Be proactive with calming supports to prevent a melt down.
- Create a safe zone. Including calming toys, sounds and lighting.
- Plan for events such as concerts and church that can be sensory overwhelming.
- Sit on the ends of rows.
- Offer ear plugs, headphones, or earmuffs to decrease sound.
- Have an exit strategy.
- Plan to arrive early at your destination. This allows your child to transition, explore new surroundings and become comfortable before sounds and crowds increase.
- Take measures to prevent wandering and elopement.
- Take turns with a trusted family member to keep an eye on your child.
- Consider having your child wear an ID bracelet or tracking device.
- Have a progressive and multifaceted safety plan in place if you're unable to locate you child.
- Choose Sensory Sensitive Events when possible, such as our Sensitive Santa Event.
- Schedule some respite time for yourself to avoid caregiver burnout. Although it can be trying to find help over the holidays, utilize university students home for the winter break.
Most importantly, enjoy the memories you'll make with your family this year!